‘I may be past my sell-by date!’: King Charles and Queen Camilla get into mischief as they try out ‘speed dating’

If you’re curious about the state of the romance market, look no further than how we accept the phrase “romance market” without so much as batting an eye. Indeed, between dating apps, the impact of social media, and specifically platforms centered around organized speed dating, love remains noble as a pursuit, but challenging as a product.

So upon hearing that King Charles III and Queen Camilla gave speed dating a try, one might skeptically raise an eyebrow. Indeed, what would the current King and Queen of England have to gain from the novelty of speed dating, especially considering their adherence to Royal protocol, etiquette, and tradition?

Well, it’s not that kind of speed dating. Per The Mirror, King Charles and Queen Camilla recently rolled up to Darjeeling Express — an Indian restaurant located on London’s Carnaby Street — and assisted the staff in arranging food packages to be sent out to Doorstep, a charity for unhoused and unstably housed families. One of the items in these food packages is — you guessed it — dates.

Indeed, King Charles bagged up the dates at such a briskly efficient pace, that his kitchen duties could not be referred to as anything other than “speed dating.” He was told that he was good enough to have a permanent speed dating job, to which the King quipped: “I may be past my sell-by date!” The Queen, meanwhile, was recruited to ladle curry into takeout boxes.

The King and Queen’s volunteer work was undertaken to mark the beginning of Ramadan this coming Friday. The restaurant, run and opened by restauranteur Asma Khan in 2017, services charitable causes every Ramadan. Also present for the occasion were numerous high-profile British Muslim women, including Shaheen Sayed, Saliha Mahmood Ahmed, Khatun Sapnara, and Saima Mir.

King Charles’ job was more important than you might think. Ramadan — which lasts for roughly a month — entails a daily fast from dawn to sunset, and per Muslim tradition, dates are the first food eaten to break the fast at sunset. This initiative from Khan’s restaurant is part of Zakat al-Fitr, which is an Islam-mandated donation of food or funds made by every abled-bodied and financially-able Muslim. It’s made with the aim of helping disadvantaged Muslims celebrate Eid al-Fitr, the celebration held at the end of Ramadan to commemorate the breaking of the fast.

For practicing adult Muslims, this practice is mandatory unless they are chronically ill, traveling, breastfeeding, diabetic, pregnant, menstruating, or elderly. “Elderly,” of course, is a subjective term, but the United Nations World Population Prospects identifies such folk as being 60 years or older.

Also off the table is tobacco, sex, and sin. Sin, in this case, referring to such acts as murder, theft, witchcraft, accepting any sort of divinity from something other than God (also known as shirking), gambling, suicide, disobeying your parents, consuming the property of an orphan placed in your care… You know what, just double check the Quran before you do anything, lest you end up catching the Day of Judgement in a bad mood and wind up in need of an overwhelmingly positive record.